I attended a four day event several years ago where I was asked to give a keynote on the second day.
It was a great connection, well received and I had tremendous positive feedback. The couple who’d organized the event in particular had given me high praise and for a couple days kept bringing up how impressed they were with my message and delivery.
The evening of the third day, however, an acquaintance mentioned to them my parentage.
They were huge fans. “Danny White is your dad?!!” They couldn’t get over it and every conversation I had with them for the duration of the event focused on him. They even asked if they could have a picture taken with me, Danny White’s daughter.
My powerful message was gone from their minds. My connection to celebrity was all that mattered.
Two things I learned from this experience: First, that fame and hype have a way of blotting out things of value.
What impressed these folks so much initially was the message I’d given. It had touched them deeply and had a positive impact on their work and purpose. Then it was tossed aside when they learned who my dad was.
This situation has arisen time after time throughout my life. I’m more than proud of my connection with my Dad. When people tell me how lucky I am to be his daughter, I say, “You're right! But you've no idea why!”
If people can get close to him through me, they’ll benefit greatly, but in different ways than they expect.
Truth is, we get things screwed up. We attach worth where we shouldn't and we're blind to it when something shinier pops up. I'm still hopeful the message in the keynote I gave was retained after all the glitter wore off.
Second lesson, too often we let the messenger influence the message.
Full transparency here; as a young parent, I did my best to model Cliff and Claire Huxstable from the Cosby Show. Tell me that wasn’t quality television and I’ll bring a debate. They were the epitome of great parenting! Should I toss out all those lessons because the actor got canceled years later for his misdeeds? Did his mistakes negate all the good his tv show did?
There are certainly times when the source should be considered, but by learning to separate the lesson from the teacher you'll be able to tell when that association is and isn't relevant.
We’ll get so much more out of the world if we can be more receptive. Closed-minds and cancelers impede growth.
Pro-tips:
Everything that glitters is not gold.
Separate the message from the messenger. You’ll learn a lot more!
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